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Carolina Broncos
life.... - Printable Version

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life.... - Badass - 01-16-2010

Sucks right now.

I have been medically retired from the navy for 10 years. Let me tell you, retirement isnt all it is cracked up to be. I really have no purpose in my life. it is hard to stay busy and satisfied. I tried many volunteer things. the most recent being the Fire Dept. it just isnt for me. it is interesting but im just not committed and i think as a fire fighter you should be.
When I was married it was a little easier. We were able to travel and basically do whatever. that was awesome being able to share my good fortune of having a steady income with someone. We did a lot together. now I just feel stuck.
I just pretty much stay home and watch tv and surf the web. I get bored. Im honestly kind of over the whole wrenching thing. thats all my life has been for 4 years.
The problem is I just dont want to do anything alone. I dont see the pleasure in it. I want to just roll out and go see more of this country before we as a country destroy it. I just dont know what to do or where to go.
My life for 6 years was all about Megan and I. Where would she like to go, what would she want to do. that was how i decided everything for years. Now i just dont knoow what I want to do. and I know doing it alone wont be the same. seems kind of boring. like i want to go see mt rushmore but I cant imagine going alone, looking at it and not having someone to turn to and talk about it.
Fawk it though, I definatly dont want to get caught up in sitting here on my ass and letting life pass me by.
I am going to sell everything i own and buy a camper and hit the road I think. It is going to be very hard for me to do this. Im actually scared a little. scared I dont know who I am or what i even enjoy anymore. I just know there has to be something better out there or at least something different.
I would give or do anything to have my Wife/life back but I just dont think that will ever happpen. It has been so long since I had to figure out what I want to do I have no idea. Nothing really brings me pleasure anymore. People suck for the most part and I dont like to deal with strangers and im not a very nice guy so i dont make friends easily. I feel i will end up on the road alone and just no desire to do anything.
you all think i got the world by the balls but it is more difficult than you know.
I will be listing a bunch of misc stuff for sale. what dont go i will put in storage.
I hope to leave in 90 days or so.
Just saying that has me worried. I have spent plenty of time on the road and it can be a lonley place. plenty of time to think and assess things.
opinions?


life.... - Badass - 01-16-2010

[youtube]KoPlkmYaEQs[/youtube]


life.... - Badass - 01-16-2010

So this isnt a pitty post or woe is me. This is a need to find myself post. I hope it didnt come off wrong. JP immediatly called me ( thx bro!) to make sure all was OK. and it is. I just need to break the cycle...anyone else know what i mean?


life.... - JayT - 01-16-2010

Dude! You alright? (thanks for calling him, JP)... You sounded a "little" depressed last night too...

I just got home from volunteering all day and hopped online to see what I missed... I could see what you saying... I haven't been through it, so I can only imagine it... I don't know what I'd do if my wife wasn't in my life...

From what I read, it sounds like you're in a rut, and just want to get out of it. I don't know what to suggest, except to find another hobby to dive into. I'm sure that you're burned out from all the wrenchin/sellin.... My "outs" are wrenchin/wheelin (which won't help now), and Darts!! I've got zero musical ability, so throwing sticks at the wall seems to be rewarding. Maybe touring with a band again would be a good idea for ya.... You'd get to see the country and also do something else you enjoy, playing! I've got an Uncle in Wyoming who tours (drums) with a band "Grease Monkeys", if you get out that way... You two would hit it off!

Without going all preacher on ya (that would be hypocritical of me)... I have also found a lot of peace and purpose lately, from our Church. We found one close to the house that we enjoy, and have been going for about 16months... I love it! That's just me, I'm not one to push God on anyone... Just reminding you that when you're lost, ask for help... He'll guide you!

Call me at anytime, day or night.... 9one9-7nine5-forty2forty7... for any reason. :biggthumpup:

JayT


life.... - Badass - 01-16-2010

im really not depressed at all. just tired of the same ol same ol. the divorce was only brought up because i am now at a different point in my life. and to show why it is hard for me to just do what makes me happy. i dont really know what that is at this point. Im collecting numbers and addresses for visits!! Ill bring my own house...lol


life.... - blazinchuck - 01-17-2010

Badass Wrote:So this isnt a pitty post or woe is me. This is a need to find myself post. I hope it didnt come off wrong. JP immediatly called me ( thx bro!) to make sure all was OK. and it is. I just need to break the cycle...anyone else know what i mean?

Eric, I know what you mean!! more than you know. i wont try to talk you out of it, its not my place since i really dont know you all that well. however, i consider you a good friend and would do anything for you. i will say, that you need to find what makes you happy. it is possible, but you have to keep your head up...no one will do that for ya. your a strong willed person, that can do anything.if yu want someone new to talk with..holla...843-276-4468:xyxthumbs:


anything for ya bro,Chuck


life.... - SC74 - 01-17-2010

I've never met you but have only heard great things about you from the guys on here who have. I've watched you on the live feed guitar performances and know that you've got a great personality. You'll get out of this rut somehow someway, but like Chuck said - keep your head up and never give up on your dreams. Feel free to call me anytime too ... 864-423-0368. I'd offer a place to crash here in G-Vegas but my wife and I are bumming cheap rent in my parents basement already until we can get a house.


life.... - trkbilder - 01-17-2010

I jumped on your case when you first signed on, I deeply regret that because I'm usually more open minded than that. I've never met you and I deeply regret that also. I work with a group of folks at my church who are all struggling with different things, issues in their lives that keeps them from reaching their full potential. You seem to fit into that category, not really depressed not really happy but searching for more. All I can say, without preaching, is you need to get more involved with other people with different interests than yours. That should stretch your horizons in new directions and give you other avenues to pursue, other interests. Yes, church is a good place to start but I'm sure with your out going personality you can find the right venue. I wish you the best in any endeavor you try and remember I'm right here-704 739 2812. :xyxthumbs:


life.... - bone collector - 01-17-2010

hey Eric keep ya head up I dont know you really either but have met you and enjoy you presence on here I got a cousin that lives off stack road in monroe if you ever want to go fishin drink some beer and shoot the $h!t give me a shout im always down for that and I dont think its all to far from ya (704) 793-6944 Kenny


life.... - Badass - 01-17-2010

Thanks guys. im keeping all these numbers. I have people tell me all the time that i can do anything. from construction to mechanics to everything in between i have done some of it all. I enjoy stretching outside my comfort zone and trying new and different things and applying that to what i already know and vice virsa. someone on WD posted about a drive to alaska. that would be awesome. My son graduates in june so i gotta hang around till then. I also need to sell the sami and trailer to be able to buy a camper. im too old to tent camp.